I wake up really early, so it was still completely dark as I surveyed the scene. There is rain coming, which will make the cleanup a whole, soggy mess. The wind from the front coming in made the toilet paper sway in the trees, ghostly images dancing and slithering in mid-air.
click for full view
Whoever was the toilet paperer (and there’s never just one) did a decent job. Very thorough. You can see they wrapped the bushes very nicely, and even made designs in the yard.
click for the big picture
And even more clever, they scanned and printed full-page pictures of me from my senior pictures. I had forgotten these existed!
what a fresh-faced cutie!
The stealthy perpetrators also exchanged our Football yard sign for a Cross Country sign, wrapped our cars with more toilet paper, pasted more of the same pictures on our cars, and wrote little messages on our car windows.
However….
a little advice:
Make sure you spell the simple words correctly. It’s embarrassing.
I used to work in a Black-Ops organization named S.T.A.R.S. It stands for Special Tactics and Rescue Service. It operated under the umbrella of Westwind Properties, located in Borneo. I am only now able to tell you this because the statute of limitations has run out on our uber-stealthy activities, and I am no longer obliged to keep it secret any more.
One time, I was on maneuvers in conjunction with Operation Hawknose, which included the intended eradication of an evil regime, and subsequent replacement with our own government. The deal went bad. We lost men. Lots of good men. The operation was unsuccessful, and the Arnee regime still exists today and has a stranglehold on deepest Bornea, as well as neighboring Machu Pichu.
During the ill-fated Operation, I was only one of three survivors. I managed to make it out of the crumbling Ivory Tower first, then had to signal for our swift and precarious extraction by helicopter.
I punched the flare, and signaled the pilot to our location. While waiting, the wind picked up, making the strawberry-red flare smoke drift, giving misdirection to my position.
Fending off the evil automatons as I waited, a firefight broke out amidst the rubble. There were bullets flying, babies crying, and soldiers dying. But I figured I would take some time to pause, and enjoy a strawberry ice-pop while I waited. It was very refreshing.
This shirt reminds me of that time. Appropriately titled:
Usually when you hear of a Panda Bear, it’s in the context of soft, sweet, cute and cuddly. Not so with today’s shirt of the day. When Pandas Attack is a collaboration between two of the giants of shirt design: Jimi Benedict (jimiyo) and AJ Dimarucot (CollisionTheory).
The scene illustrates a raging Panda Bear splattered across the entirety of the shirt. Done in complete black and white, it reflects the Panda Bear’s natural coloring.
click on the pic for up-close awesomeness.
One of the things I like best about this shirt is when you’re standing close, the design appears to be just random splashes of white across the shirt. But if you stand back a little bit, the all-over design comes into focus and you get the whole, raging Panda scene – complete with dripping spit, slobber, and sinew!
And after all this talk about Panda Attacks, here is a little something for ya. But even when they attack they’re soooo cute!
